The Forgotten Land

Monday, December 03, 2007

Woah it's feels good, not physically cause i'm feeling dead tired now. But i never smiled and felt so happy in 2 months. I finally smiled and joked. And talked crap... LOL.... Even if it's just for like a short while... I was finally able to feel happy. Guess all the serious look i had to endure to make people think seriously about me plan has failed. LOL.... I just love this joking side of me... I feels so good to finally free myself...

Freedom... As long as it doesn't go against the law of God. That is good... I wonder why i felt so happy just because of going to church ? ..... Come to think of it... I wonder if it's God or my friends that make me so happy.... I want to say i'm happy because i'm in the house of the Lord.... But something just holds me back.... Is it true ? Am i really feeling that way or is it a lie i tell myself ?

Love the Lord.... Am i really doing that ? Sometimes it seems as if i'm leading a fake life... Going to God it's like praise God this and that... Going to work... Hahahaha.... Yeah right..... Laughting and talking to people.... Not bothering to tell them anything about God.... Unless they ask something... Which they rarely do... What have i done for the Lord ? Did i even do anything for him ? Was i ever faithful to him ? Am i still faithful ? What is the standard of being faithful to me ? Many questions are poping in my head... What should i do ? I really have no idea... Should i help out in church ? How can i help ? Do i have any chance of helping ? Oh well.... God will guide... I'm sure he will be able to give me something to serve him... Even if it's a little thing, i'm not worthy to do it... But i'll try my best to serve him.

Had a fun time in church yesterday... I wonder why i wasn't shaking so much when the choir was up on stage and presenting.... Maybe God was beside me holding my legs... LOL... Sorry arr... Might be abit smelly... LOL.... Oh well... Lots of sight to behold like Su shan and Ke Jia cleaning their feet with tissue in front of me... For what reason i have no idea... LOL... Oh yeah i remembered.... Their feets were wet from cleaning the toliet.... LOL...

Went out with Serene, Donna and her cousin Jeffery...LOL... HE is one good guy man... Finally i am talking of menga and animation and Dota again... How long was it that i last talked about that ? LOL... I can't remember... It's always has been this and that... Work and all... Boring stuff... Go church pray better... Something it feels as if i will feel better if i don't live in this world... Oh well.. Suffer a few more years than go back to my home above... I just don't feel that i suit living in this place... It's not where i belong...

Shopping a dreaded thing.... I hate that to the core... LOL... BW la... Keep teasing me... Oh well...LOL... At least i chatted with Jeffery abit... It wasn't that bad but i wanted to talk rubbish to have some fun instead....

Ahhh.... Dun have time to complete... Need to OT again... Oh well.... Byez....

and the frost fell...
those glassy crystal orbs... Shannon left a note @
9:46 am

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About Me

Crossroads

Memories Of The Wind

Whispers Of The Forest

Whistle While You Walk

The Trodden Road

Memories of the forgotten

Monday, December 03, 2007